They say I have to many irons in the fire. . . I say to them. . . I NEED a bigger fire!
I sit here writing with dozens of thoughts racing across my mind. . . I want to tell you all so much. . . I want to share how God is doing amazing things in my life. . . I want to ask why is it so hard to walk this road. . .
I made a commitment to myself I was going to dive deeper into The Word. . . I had picked up a new devotional that was sure to get me on track and keep me there. . .
For some time now, I have been wondering about The Holy Spirit. . . Last year, after I dropped my little boy off everyday at school, I would pick up my conversation with GOD. . . about Will and how I needed Him to take care of him. . . keep him safe. . .
Many times, I felt guilty. . . for about five minutes of our morning drive, it was just me and Him. . . My baby girls sat quietly in the back waiting for my attention. . . It always seemed to be around the same time, same point of my drive that I always ended up asking of HIM the same request. . . Thinking back. . . it was always on my mind . . . It became routine {in a good way} sharing with Him these desires. . .
MORE OF YOU. . . Oh, LORD. . . MORE of You!
USE me. . . prepare me. . . FILL me. . . EXTEND my territory. . . make me BOLD for YOU. . . USE ME!!!!!!!!!
Not knowing what exactly this meant, but just knowing I hungered to do HIS will. . .
I have to say. . . God heard my cries {and still does}. . . He has opened some many doors for me to grow spiritually, it just amazes me. . . The things I have seen. . . The things I have felt. . .
At the same time. . . I feel like I am being attacked on all sides. . . He knows my weaknesses and he knows where to attack. . . But HE is always there, reminding me to choose HIM. . .
About three weeks ago, maybe four. . . I started writing a post about The Holy Spirit. . . I have been blessed by a man I now call my friend. . . even better, my brother in Christ. . . Sam also writes and shares his love for Christ here {you should check it out}. . . I LOVE how God knows what we need. . . who we need. . . Well, I shared a few things with Sam and he shared a few things with me. . . One thing he said, that just branded itself onto my heart. . . whatever you do, he said, just DON’T be afraid. . . don’t be afraid of what God wants to give you. . . I don’t think I have gone a day without thinking of those words. . .
The devil has told me I wasn’t qualified {smart enough} to write the post that awaits in my “drafts” box. . . Every time I scamper away to write, LIFE always calls. . . Maybe I will get finished. . . Say what I would like to say. . . Share what God has placed on my heart. . .
But for now. . . I just wanted to let you all know that I am still here. . . battling the enemy. . . still SEEKING more of Him. . . praying for clarity and direction. . . trying to hide HIS Word in my heart. . .
I hate being so random with my writing. . . I SO want to be sure and steadfast. . . SHARING with all GOD’s goodness and love. . . if something I say reaches just ONE person. . .
it. is. all. worth. it.
Sam’s words reached me.
Whatever life is throwing at you. . . Choose HIM. . . Sometimes it is hard, almost too difficult. . . BUT hold tight to HIM. . . CONTINUE seeking more of HIM. . .
He KNOWS the desires of our heart. . .
I want to fill every moment serving HIM. . .
He KNOWS the desires of my heart. . .
Where I am weak. . .
HE IS STRONG.
